Progress toward durable and energy-dense lithium-ion batteries has been hindered by instabilities at electrolyte-electrode interfaces, leading to poor cycling stability, and by safety concerns associated with energy-dense lithium metal anodes. Solid polymeric electrolytes (SPEs) can help mitigate these issues; however, the SPE conductivity is limited by sluggish polymer segmental dynamics. We overcome this limitation via zwitterionic SPEs that self-assemble into superionically conductive domains, permitting decoupling of ion motion and polymer segmental rearrangement. Although crystalline domains are conventionally detrimental to ion conduction in SPEs, we demonstrate that semicrystalline polymer electrolytes with labile ion-ion interactions and tailored ion sizes exhibit excellent lithium conductivity (1.6 mS/cm) and selectivity (t + ≈ 0.6-0.8). This new design paradigm for SPEs allows for simultaneous optimization of previously orthogonal properties, including conductivity, Li selectivity, mechanics, and processability.