UC San Diego
The Abyss of the Unknown
- Author(s): St.Clair, Jasmine
- Advisor(s): Donnelly, Kyle
- et al.
Gregory Wallace once said to me, "You are comfortable with the idea that you don't know something. Cut it out and go figure it out." For most of my life, my fallback answer to things I was uncomfortable with or lacking confidence in, was "I don't know", afraid that I didn't have the right answer or that I would be unable to articulate my thought process efficiently. These past three years at UCSD have given me the conviction to be proactive in figuring things out for myself.
As an artist, there is always going to be a sense uncertainty. I've learned to embrace it and look at it as what is truly beautiful about art. Learning to take a leap of faith, make a big bold choice, and fail in a great way. If we don't fall, how will we learn, right? Singer Jhene Aiko said, "I do not feel the fear of falling, I want to fly". This program has given me the courage to fly into unknown spaces, throw caution to the wind, and take pride or see beauty in my mistakes.
Although, I'm sure I knew what I was doing in other productions and scene work, playing Anna in Drums in the Night was the first time I was actually able to feel my growth and have a sense that I indeed knew what I was doing. From movement, to voice and speech, to having the guts to take a leap into the abyss of the unknown, it was like the world opened up to me and I feel confident leaping into my next.