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Playing with Fire

  • Author(s): Hodges, Chaz
  • Advisor(s): Donnelly, Kyle
  • et al.

All my life I've had a heart like a broken levee. It has the reputation of being sensitive and full, crackling with an undeniable depth. However, I never knew how to access my well. At a young age, I learned that silence can be deafening, darkness can be illuminating, and sadness can be invaluable. As a first generation college student, attending UCSD was a life altering experience.

Professors like Kyle Donnelly and Gregory Wallace, put me face-to-face with myself. I met me time and time again in the regality of characters like Titania, the sadness of sweet Oya, and the indomitable spirit of battered Beth. Through these women I found a voice - gone was the hesitancy of girlhood.

When I found theatre - I found a prism, a kaleidoscope of all the ideas that I needed to convey. A colorful way to explore the inequalities of the world. Needless to say, it has been frightfully rewarding. Never has there been a time where I have felt the most at ease and trusting of human coexistence.

Flourishing among many like-minded artists not only taught me how to be active but also encouraged it. A small flame burns bright within my belly so much so, it amazes me that a once shy, fearful, reserved actress - now thrives on uncertainty. I used to live life with my eyes closed, anxiously approaching the next moment with held breath and extreme doubt. Now, well now I sizzle and I long to play with fire. Thanks to my training, I am only interested in art that will set the world ablaze.

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