Most discussions of G\"odel's theorems fall into one of two types: either they
emphasize perceived philosophical, cultural "meanings" of the theorems, and perhaps sketch
some of the ideas of the proofs, usually relating G\"odel's proofs to riddles and
paradoxes, but do not attempt to present rigorous, complete proofs; or they do present
rigorous proofs, but in the traditional style of mathematical logic, with all of its heavy
notation and difficult definitions, and technical issues which reflect G\"odel's original
approach and broader logical issues. Many non-specialists are frustrated by these two
extreme types of expositions and want a complete, rigorous proof that they can understand.
Such an exposition is possible, because many people have realized that variants of
G\"odel's first incompleteness theorem can be rigorously proved by a simpler middle
approach, avoiding philosophical discussions and hand-waiving at one extreme; and also
avoiding the heavy machinery of traditional mathematical logic, and many of the harder
detail's of G\"odel's original proof, at the other extreme. This is the just-right
Goldilocks approach. In this exposition we give a short, self-contained Goldilocks
exposition of G\"odel's first theorem, aimed at a broad, undergraduate audience.